After a few days of intermittent gagging and vomiting episodes, Gabriel is headed to Akron Children's Hospital. As of this morning, he could not keep down Gatorade and that was just the last straw. That, and his fever that he spiked in the middle of the night.
We can't assume that it's viral. Gabriel has a shunt that could be blocked or infected. He could have a bowel obstruction. He could have a severe UTI. His Chiari II malformation could be becoming symoptomatic (Please, God! No! Not that!) If it were his Chiari, they may have to remove a portion of the base of his skull to make room for the brain tissue that is being pulled downard.
My mind has been running wild all morning, and it even ran into "brain tumor territory" which had my heart racing and mourning over something that hasn't even happened yet. I gagged down a cup of coffee to ward of my splitting headache and I'm just waiting for Amos to call me to give me updates.
This morning was supposed to go something like this:
I wake up and get ready before anyone else in the house wakes up, and join my mom and sisters at the Chapel in Green for the Authentic Intimacy conference. Meanwhile, Gabriel suits up in his overalls and goes on a date with grandma to buy baby chicks. It's all he's talked about for weeks. Every cardboard box he gets his hands on is a chicken house that he's gonna build.
What this morning really turned into:
Jonah screaming at about 1:30am. Gabriel crying at 2:30 am with a fever. Amos was sleeping in Jonah's bed with him, and so Gabriel joined me in my bed. I gave him motrin, even though he insisted that he felt fine. Fast forward to about 6am... Jonah peed through his diaper. Gabriel seemed ok, until we gave him Gatorade which he started gagging on immediately... followed by non stop vomiting. Amos took him to the hospital. I'm here alone with the kids.
The other kids are in the basement watching a movie and entertaining Jonah. I'm trying to jockey the phone calls from customers, which is probably good at keeping my mind occupied, but I just want to ignore all of them and yell "Leave me alone, my special needs kid is sick and I'm terrified!"
I called my friend, Megan, who called our shared hospital friend and clinic coordinator, Shannon, who informed us that several of the myelo kids have been admitted over the last few days with rotavirus. (My mom gut says this is not viral.) However, there's supposedly an amazing neurosurgeon on staff this weekend because the regular is out of town. Also, he's from the U.S. Navy which makes me feel even better for some reason. Megan called me back and asked one simple question "what do you need?" Out of nowhere, I broke down. I was gonna keep it together and just say "nothing." My entire body betrayed me and my breath left in such a hurry that I feared I was going to gasp loudly to reinflate my lungs. So she just started praying right then and there. It comforted my heart and I realized that at that very moment, that is everything I needed: Jesus.
Amos, the calm parent, is at the hospital. Last I talked to him, he said that Gabriel tells him that as soon as they're done with his "check up" (that's what Gabriel keeps calling it), he's gotta go with Grandma on his date to buy baby chicks. I am seriously praying that the day ends up that way.
Before Gabriel left, he puckered his little lips up into the the biggest heap of kisses you've ever seen and he laid one on me. Then he said "I miss you mommy." I can't get that out of my head and it's driving me crazy.
No comments:
Post a Comment