Solid Rock

Gabriel’s birthday was nice. He got lots of attention and cake. We lit and relit the candles several times because he got such a kick out of blowing out the candles. He would yell “moke” (smoke) every time he blew them out. Ava helped him with his Reese Cup ice cream cake from Dairy Queen. I didn’t even notice how much she was helping him until she handed me the empty plate and said, “Gabriel’s all done with his cake, but I kind of ate it all.”

He swam in the pool with his uncle “Nonny” (Jonny) and got to hike through the woods in a carrier on Aunt Julie’s put Gabriel in a carrier and walked through the woods like that. I didn’t know if she knew how heavy 33 pounds is but I’m sure she’ll never forget what a third of one hundred pounds feels like ever again!

When we drove home that evening, it was like a weight was lifted from my shoulders. I just felt a tired ache, but not the absolute grief of the memories. It was a lot like turning a page. I’m just trying to focus on the fact that two years later, we’re not sitting in a dark, depressing hospital all summer long. For that, I’m thankful. Sometimes, I wonder how we made it through.

Amos was working for Smucker’s at the time, plus we ran our roll off container business ourselves (still do) with the help of some awesome help. Thankfully, Smucker’s was wonderful and made it very easy for Amos to take off for the FMLA (Family Medical Leave of Absence). We would take turns sitting in the Reinberger Center at Akron Children’s Hospital, taking calls and scheduling deliveries. We’d go home every so often to take care of bookwork and to shower and sleep in our own beds. Visitors would come and go. It was a needed distraction from all that was going on.

We almost forgot about Amos’ poison ivy. He had such a bad patch of it on his knee. It became infected and was such a disgusting mess that he couldn’t even bend his leg. He finally went to the ER, which was just around the corner, and they put him on 2 antibiotics. It was ugly, though he never complained about it. He was too busy trying desperately to care for me and for Gabriel’s needs. He would receive visitors when I couldn’t. I couldn’t smile or answer questions or be comforted, so I just hid in another part of the hospital. I felt like people were coming to see the baby with the big scar. Like he was part of some exhibit. I didn’t want people looking at him or talking about how mangled his back looked.

It was in the hospital that I realized that this is the time in life that makes it clear just how much God provided the right husband for me. I didn’t say perfect, I said the right one for me. There have been so many times that I got angry at Amos because he’s the type that is actually able to live for the moment while I was trying to live five years down the road when Gabriel realizes that he’s different from other kids and wears a diaper to kindergarten. I thought Amos was really just in denial and refused to see the reality. Every so often, Amos’ tears over Gabriel, tells me that he understands. We both need a little perspective from each other.

Suddenly, Bible verses like Matthew 6:34 actually applied to our lives, “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” When you have food, clothing, shelter and a healthy family, you tend use that verse for petty things, or at least we did.

As a kid in Sunday school I used to watch a little green blinking light, as we would sing together songs like “My Hope Is Built On Nothing Less” by Edward Mote 1797-1874. In Sunday school, we sang because we liked to, and because it passed the time until lunch, which was when the light stopped blinking. The meaning of that song is much greater now. It goes like this…

1. My hope is built on nothing less
 Than Jesus' blood and righteousness; 
I dare not trust the sweetest frame,
 But wholly lean on Jesus' name.
 On Christ, the solid Rock, I stand; 
All other ground is sinking sand.

2. When darkness veils His lovely face, 
I rest on His unchanging grace;
 In every high and stormy gale
 My anchor holds within the veil.
 On Christ, the solid Rock, I stand;
 All other ground is sinking sand.

3. His oath, His covenant, and blood
 Support me in the whelming flood;
 When every earthly prop gives way,
 He then is all my Hope and Stay.
 On Christ, the solid Rock, I stand; 
All other ground is sinking sand.

4. When He shall come with trumpet sound,
 Oh, may I then in Him be found,
 Clothed in His righteousness alone, Faultless to stand before the throne!
 On Christ, the solid Rock, I stand; 
All other ground is sinking sand.

If you’re not in the middle of a storm, you will be. Get on The Rock that is Jesus Christ. He is our only rescue.